If I had a time machine in my twenties and I used it to travel into the future to see what my life would be like today, as a father to two little girls… I might have run for the hills when I eventually got around to the time I met my wife. No, but seriously folks, fatherhood is NOT what I thought it’d be and I’m finally OK to talk about it.
As I write this, my daughters are five and seven years old. My oldest is in grade 2 and my youngest is entertaining the bejesus out of everyone in senior kindergarten. And while there are benefits to having two kids who are just over two years apart, it doesn’t make it any easier when they both fall victim to Temperatus Tantripicum, or the temper tantrum as it’s known in English. OK, that first part’s not really Latin but if I kept quiet about it would you have believed me? And do we really need the word “temper” in front of “tantrum??” Do kids ever have a happy tantrum? I can’t imagine you hear too often someone say, “Rebecca, now three years constipated, threw a happy tantrum upon learning of the benefits of fibre on WebMD.com.” Continue reading Embrace The Chaos -or- My Kids Are Jerks And That’s OK!→
As far back as I can remember there was always a dog in the picture. Our first dog was a Black Labrador named Mini, named after one of my father’s old Mounty (RCMP) buddies. Our second, Mini 2. Next was a Beagle named Oscar (no idea where the name came from). Then there was our dumb-as-a-post Shar-Pei Marty (I was a huge fan of the “Back To The Future” trilogy).So, I guess I can say with a degree of certainty that I’m a dog guy.
In October of 2013 we lost our Bernese Mountain Dog, Toblerone. She lived longer than the average Berner to 10.5 years and was the first dog who’s death I was present for. I took her in to the vet after a change in her behaviour. She had become lethargic and would lie in the same spot for the entire day. I figured they’d give her some meds and send us packing but a quick ultrasound later and the next thing I knew she was fitted with an IV of pentobarbital and within seconds she was gone. We had been forced to make an on-the-spot decision to have her put down due to a close-to-rupturing spleen. I used to think people who lost a pet were a bit strange when they’d be going on like they’d just lost a child or something to that effect. Then we lost Tobie and it put it all into perspective. Continue reading Life is Ruff So Get a Dog -or- That K9-o-Mine is Devine→
When Thing 1… er… our first child was born in 2009 I took parental leave from work for six months. Yeah, we can do that here. One of the many benefits of living in Canada. It was one of the best decisions I’d ever made (next to buying a life-size stormtrooper). Now, being that it was our first child and my wife was doing a whole lotta breastfeeding, there wasn’t a helluva lot for me to do at times. So I did what any self-respecting father would do. I took up running.
We all have our little quirks. Some more apparent than others. Some are more abundant than others and then there are some that are downright inappropriate, transcending illegal. But in the end, they make us who we are.
Now, I’m not perfect by any sense of the word but I do go out of my way at times to make others feel comfortable. Sometimes I go too far out of my way and my OCD kicks in, takes over and the KD Mack you know ceases to exist, albeit briefly.
When I’m at the barber shop getting my hairs clipped, I habitually keep my hands from slipping underneath the sheet. This is solely for the comfort of my hair stylist who is almost always female. I want her to see where my hands are at ALL times. I’m trying to let her know, speaking unspoken words, “I’m not a pervert.” Do I really have to do that? No, but quirks are what they are. Continue reading Going Out Of My Way For Your Comfort -or- I Wasn’t Doing Anything Officer!→
Curtain opens, we fade in. I’m sitting in a classroom as I write this listening to my partner yammer on to kids about the evils of Social Media. I’m not listening. I’m typing…
Strike the harp and we flashback to April 1996! It’s an overcast day. There are still patches of wet snow on the ground. Evidently, Spring has sprung.
I’m working on set, just over halfway through making a horrible movie called “The Long Kiss Goodnight” (sorry, I needed the money). I’m the on-set-production assistant. Not a very glorious title but it was one of the best times I’d ever have working in the film and TV biz. My job was to deliver mail, scripts, and everything else under the sun to the cast and crew working on set. Continue reading That Samuel L. Jackson Guy -or- Girl Advice From Nick Fury→
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